ABSILVER's World

I don't know... help requested. I sit here.  The night of the first Seder, no plans. I just don't really know what I believe. Do I believe I should eat Matzo 8 days? Do I drink 4 glasses of wine Monday cause it is Pesach? I have hosted some great Seders, hagadahs and all. I have been to some great Seders at home, Granny and Grandpas,  and in New York City. I have hosted and been where the love and friendship you could imagine could last the 40 years in a dessert. I have been to one in college days where bitter herbs were not the kind you dipped. But what do I believe? The Days School said keep kosher for Pesach was the key to getting into heaven! The Orthodox Rabbis say loving another man could send me to hell, or at least have me stoned to death in a religious court. How do I believe I should only eat matzo, and do as I am told for 8 days? When, I won't stop loving who I was born to love? I tried to deny that for 29 years and wasn't good for

You get in the business of what do I write about.  There are mornings where I know what is in my head, but frankly they feel too personal.  Or, I just don't feel like the feelings and thoughts are not ready for the world to see.  Sometimes, they haunt me around stupid things that I just don't want to admit are even in my mind or worse have to read after I type them. This is one of those days, but I haven't written in a while and I thought why not take a chance.  Let's see if these feelings and thoughts deserve to make it into the ether of my blog. Every year, an amazing thing happens to or for me.   Frankly, it may seem to most an unusual occurrence   Something, akin to a community looking forward to a hurricane cause they have a drought. Some years it occurs around Thanksgiving.  This years was a little later.  Some years it happens till spring this year a little sooner. The symptoms for those of us who live in South Florida are clear.  There is this influx of

I am imagining a moment in time this morning.  I sit here at the Starbucks watching the ocean blend into the cloudy sky.  Most mornings the sun rises and peaks through a cloud.   This amazing moment and I get to watch it and enjoy it often.  The other night, I witnessed from my own window the emergence of a lovely full moon.  A small shade of sun still radiating through the clouds and turning the moon slightly orange. Both moments make me realize how lucky I am and amazing Mother Nature can be.   I love watching the visitors taking a picture of the sun as if this is a spectacular moment.  Frankly, they are right, I just get to experience it often. Amazing we hear about amazing sunsets but rarely about the wonder of a sunrise.  The only catch, and maybe the reason, you have to get up early to catch the sunrise.  This morning I was up way early. So, walk completed, rain started, and time for coffee. I keep thinking about moments in time where life changes.

Chores accomplished including picking up the dry cleaning so I can pack tomorrow for a journey west for work.  Condo is clean, time to get it ready for my sister's visit next week. I am worried about Provincetown, friends and family.  As Lee says this house has lasted 200 years it will stand, but been more than 12 hours no electricity or heat and I worry more about people than things and buildings these days any way.  I worry and feel lucky, to be in Fort Lauderdale and enjoying what is another wonderful winter day here. I also, sit here at what I believe is an inflection point, a turning point in my life.  I do this on occasion, reflect back on what I see as pivotal turns in my life that changed me or my life direction.   There are obvious ones like pledging AEPi, co-oping with IBM, coming out to the world, living in New York, and a variety of moves in my career and home.  There are also those that change me, cause I am just ready to change. Today isn't one of those days.

I sit here at an intersection of my mind. Mental Lifestyle Ambition Friends and Family Mentally: I like to live and work in a world of challenges.  I like to be forced to think, create and act.  It is both a curse and a gift.  I once had a boyfriend ask me if I could think about nothing for an hour.  So, I did.  I thought about what was nothing. Why I couldn't think about nothing? Analyzed why nothing was bothering me and then realized I had wast an hour thinking about nothing.   I find it hard to meditate and just don't know how to stop my mind.  Amazingly and gratefully I don't have a challenge sleeping nor do I remember many dreams. I happened this week to be in the presence of two people who can cause my mind to get turbo charged and frankly was fun.  One was a previous boss,spending an hour together made me remember how special she is and our connection.  If I have achieved anything in my career it is being a catalyst for change, and s

There is a bogus, thankfully I researched, email floating around that is supposed to be from Bill Cosby but it is not.     http://billcosby.com/2011/09/if-you-got-the-bogus-email-its-time-to-hit-delete/    Supposed to be about his feelings at 83 but he is only 75 going on 76. I started writing cause frankly it pissed me off.  So, I changed the below to not be critical of Bill Cosby but I am... I am tired of people assuming they know what other people have endured, because they see them walking down the street with tattoos or studs in their ears. Tired, of people judging people who have found hardship in their lives and accept no responsibility to help them.  Maybe, they lost their job because their skills were no longer needed, or because they came down with a chronic illness through no fault of their own, or possibly the one you think looks strange is really a CEO of a new media company.  Maybe they lost their job cause some artist, media person, or 1% decided to do their next p

What I learned in 2012... and desires for 2013. 1) Good work and working with good friends is a great way to earn a living. 2) I am truly blessed and lucky to have an accepting and loving family.  I also learned that there is something special about the Silverman family.  We all have special families, just nice to see in my own. 3) Savannah really is a wonderful city, and all bias aside, I believe is prettier than Charleston, SC.  Primarily it is because Savannah was planned from the beginning and is a true river city. 4) The United States of America has shown again that it can evolve.  That we can have relatively fair elections even if we disagree, when the time comes make progress both politically, economically, and socially. 5) I believe that most politicians start in politics to do something good.  They may get tarnished along the way, but they still remember their reasons.  That is when things come to the wire they can make the right decisions and surprise us all.