People say where were you?

People say where were you?

Where were you when JFK was shot (I was not born yet).

They say where were you when you heard John Lennon was assassinated. (I was in High School

).

But, where I was 12 years ago has helped to define who I am, how I see my future, and how I see my country.

Twelve years ago, I was sitting in my office in Palisades, NY.  I had a team of 15 professionals, and I am sure we were on a call and somebody said did you hear..  I went rushing out to see, and as a conference center, all TV's were on CNN.  Maybe the first hit of the first tower was an accident.  No, there was a second.  Maybe the towers will withstand the hit, maybe .. then people started jumping.  The towers started to crumble and I stared at the TV and watched across the Hudson River as I saw the city that I had admired so much turn into a crisis zone. 

Then the Pentagon was attacked and again hope that there are no injuries.  Maybe they weren't related, and maybe this was all some weird accident.  No, then the plane in Pennsylvania, and there were no more maybes the planes left from the same place.

A colleague and friend yesterday reminded me it was 12 years ago, and she said one of the memories she has of me sending a note to my team and insisting that they all go home to be with their family.  The business of IBM would wait a day. 

Where was I, when I heard on TV that there was too much help in the city and so many New Yorkers crowding the streets to help that the responders couldn't get through?

Where was I on Rosh Hashannah that year, at services, looking at people who had lost love ones.  Saying prayers for those hoping that they would find their family or friends alive still. 

Where was I on Yom Kippur, listening to the Muslim Imam share his pain with the Jewish Congregation and how New York was a city of many faiths all coming together to care and stand up for one another.

Where was I when I walked down 7th Ave and looking at the memorial tiles that were created for love ones.. or the make shift photo gallery of pictures of the horror that is and was 9/11.

Yesterday, waiting for dinner with Graham, this man of 27 says where were you?  he was a senior in High School still shaken in disbelief that it has been twelve years.  As much as 9/11 has defined my life I was 36 already and had lived a mostly peaceful existence but for him this was real still and he mentioned Syria and I caught a concern of his that maybe 9/11 made sure would be with him for his life.

Where was I?  I was in shock.  Was getting ready to go on vacation with my Mom.  I realized then as we were in California.  This tragedy was like the waves from a pebble being dropped.  We all were affected but the further away you were on 9/11 the waves were less intense but still felt.

We in this country live a peaceful luxury, of geography and neighbors.  Neighbors in Canada who housed people on flights on their way to NYC.  Neighbors around the world that sent help, and responded.  People, Companies, competitors all coming together in NYC, Washington and PA to care for and hope for miracles of saved lives.

Who was I?  I was a southern boy in Rockland County, NY in shock and I have to say 12 years later I still am.  It took me years to be able to even go down to where the towers were.  I had been in them, been in meetings, been down at hotels visiting friends many times.  But not for a conference call and living across the Hudson River this could have been me. 

Who am I?  I am proud of being an American and watching as people came together.  Proud to be near and a part of a city with compassion not just for those born on our soil, or living in New York, but for any person that needed care from this tragedy. 

Who am I?  I am simple man, trying to be happy, and hoping the world will decide lives and happiness are more important than a sense of righteousness.  That education, clean water, food, and simple things will help change the world so those that choose to hate will have a moment to pause before they act.  Education is not just to educate the terrorist who committed these tragic acts, but, we need to be educated to understand their history and why this happens.  We need to put our feet in their world, their sandals, and understand what makes these people decide that taking their and the numerous lives lost on 9/11 was more important than staying home with their family.  We who live in the richest country in history, need to walk in their shoes to understand and learn to show empathy and compassion not just for our losses but for theirs and their challenges living day to day.  

Compassion does not mean we have to forgive, and certainly doesn’t mean we forget, it means that we care about humanity and with understanding and compassion we can help others and possibly prevent other tragedies.

Where am I on this 9/11?  Getting ready to have friends over for dinner, and be content to be with people I care so much about!

Where were you on 9/11?