Passage of Love and Time
Sunday, after a long life my Uncle Kenny Passed on to the next world. As I sit here, getting ready to start the day of work there is a slow rain outside my window and calm to the day. Good time to reflect and also to take in the last few days.
The Rabbi, at their home on Monday evening, asked people to share memories of my Uncle Kenny and all I could do was just stand in silence. Seeing my cousins and generations standing around reminded me of how special he was to so many. After my cousin Sherri was so eloquent and heart felt at the funeral, I felt speechless and was not sure what to say. But, sitting on the flight home I found some thoughts and wanted and started to write this as I complete it today.
My first clear memories are at my Grandmother's house. The Bassners and Silvermans for Thanksgiving and her birthday and Mother's Day. We would be up the day before and the Bassners would come in the next day. Uncle Keeny always seemed to be upbeat, and had a zest for life. They all seemed in a good mood, and warm to us all and as we all grew up this didn't change. He also was so genuine, loving and helpful with my Grandmother. Whether in Anderson or after her move to Savannah, his compassion and gentleness with her was very special.
Another favorite memory, was a grand trip to Calloway Gardens. I remember it as fun and my guess is that it was a fairly good time for both families. Frankly, I also seemed to be a target for teasing at the pool. I am not sure how it happened or if my memory has been altered by time, cause my Mom didn't remember it the same (smiles), but I remember going to the circus with him and my Mom. Looking back, I assume he saw that I needed an escape and for a short time and I felt special, when I was feeling down before.
As I grew older, I remember Uncle Kenny and Aunt Theresa as a safe haven for me. I have written about this before, but in my Atlanta days going to there house for Shabbos dinner is a very special memory. I knew if I needed them they were there. But, I knew I had been raised with strong feet and self determination. Going to other families meals always came with inquiries, judgement, and unsolicited advice. Doing shabbos with Aunt Theresa and Uncle Kenny was more about being there and knowing I was loved. The Rabbi said yesterday, Uncle Kenny was not the kind of parent to discipline his children, but was more setting an example and a high standard for his children. He and my Aunt raised their daughters by example. Looking back to these Friday nights they did for me as well. Taught me to treat company as special.
Passage of time, is to realize how long it had been since I had seen so much of my family. We all get caught in our lives and time seems to pass. Flying around the country for work, moving homes, finding and losing love. So much has happened, and I need to do more to be with family. Looking back to Years of being together around my Grandmother, living in Atlanta, and life just happens. I realized from this experience, how much I miss family, and need refocus on family in my life as well.
The Rabbi, at their home on Monday evening, asked people to share memories of my Uncle Kenny and all I could do was just stand in silence. Seeing my cousins and generations standing around reminded me of how special he was to so many. After my cousin Sherri was so eloquent and heart felt at the funeral, I felt speechless and was not sure what to say. But, sitting on the flight home I found some thoughts and wanted and started to write this as I complete it today.
My first clear memories are at my Grandmother's house. The Bassners and Silvermans for Thanksgiving and her birthday and Mother's Day. We would be up the day before and the Bassners would come in the next day. Uncle Keeny always seemed to be upbeat, and had a zest for life. They all seemed in a good mood, and warm to us all and as we all grew up this didn't change. He also was so genuine, loving and helpful with my Grandmother. Whether in Anderson or after her move to Savannah, his compassion and gentleness with her was very special.
Another favorite memory, was a grand trip to Calloway Gardens. I remember it as fun and my guess is that it was a fairly good time for both families. Frankly, I also seemed to be a target for teasing at the pool. I am not sure how it happened or if my memory has been altered by time, cause my Mom didn't remember it the same (smiles), but I remember going to the circus with him and my Mom. Looking back, I assume he saw that I needed an escape and for a short time and I felt special, when I was feeling down before.
As I grew older, I remember Uncle Kenny and Aunt Theresa as a safe haven for me. I have written about this before, but in my Atlanta days going to there house for Shabbos dinner is a very special memory. I knew if I needed them they were there. But, I knew I had been raised with strong feet and self determination. Going to other families meals always came with inquiries, judgement, and unsolicited advice. Doing shabbos with Aunt Theresa and Uncle Kenny was more about being there and knowing I was loved. The Rabbi said yesterday, Uncle Kenny was not the kind of parent to discipline his children, but was more setting an example and a high standard for his children. He and my Aunt raised their daughters by example. Looking back to these Friday nights they did for me as well. Taught me to treat company as special.
Passage of time, is to realize how long it had been since I had seen so much of my family. We all get caught in our lives and time seems to pass. Flying around the country for work, moving homes, finding and losing love. So much has happened, and I need to do more to be with family. Looking back to Years of being together around my Grandmother, living in Atlanta, and life just happens. I realized from this experience, how much I miss family, and need refocus on family in my life as well.
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